Break from Autism this week

I took a small break from Autism this week – it was really refreshing – I was in San fran this week on work( away from R ) and just did not go not think Autism at all
It was a good break and I needed it and I did not make myself take a break or anything – I just did not feel like thinking or talking Autism at all – It was good to visit the world of typical people and speak their language
R started Preschool – we really like the preschool – ver structured 3.5 hours per day 4 days a week – but this is what I have some stress with – all his individual services have been dropped – the school people assure us that it is going to be okay as ABA is their main method of instruction and for the first 12 weeks the ratio is 4 students with 1 teacher and 2 assistants so a pretty good ratio actually
But we will probably be stepping up the VB as soon as we can

How is Rohan doing?

Its so hard to answer that question – I feel I speak a different language now – In an Autie Mom’s language – we still have some oral defensiveness and sensory issues. He is not verbal – However he is communicating AMAZINGLY well through PECS – picture exchange system + sign language + hand leading and gestures. He also appears to be very intelligent and is really crazy about numbers, words the computer and most of all books – the kid cannot pass by the written word without trying to read it. In many ways he is a MUCH more loving child – I have only once before felt this loved and this much a center of someone’s world – it’s a great feeling All in all it rocks to be his mom

However NT kids are making geometric progress at the time when he is making arithmetic progress – know what I mean?- Socially - Rohan is like an 18 month old
90% of the days I am really happy with the way things are – 10% of the time I get bogged down by the demons – which really are – envy of my normal life – the life I was meant to have , (the why me demon), wistfulness and guilt( how simple life used to be before –anything I could have done so we could have stayed on the main road and not taken the detour to Autism – did the vaccinations , antibiotics cause his ASD- was it genetic ).
Truly 90% of the time I am very happy , living in the present and grateful for what Rohan is – I throw away the developmental milestone chart, and look at the way he is developing which really has its own wisdom . I really am growing up and I like who I am turning into!